Sunday, August 2, 2009

copeing with the loss of my cat?

My 9 year old cat(my baby girl) was diagnosed 3 months ago with kidney disease weve treated her as yet but shes relasped now and refused to eat they put her back on a drip but it made her chest bad so took her off she came home lastnight is very weak but seems comfortable My vet said this is probably the time to let go and we have an appointment at 12 to put her to sleep but i dont think i can do it,if i new how long it was going to be id keep her home and let her die here am i being cruel and if i do go thropugh with it how do i cope without my best freind?One side is saying shes ready to go but to see here curled up sleeping shes in no pain just comfortable breaks my heart to think gives a little purr now and then looks up i cant live without my girl!Please help
Answers:
(((((( Hayley ))))))

I am very, very, very sorry that you are having to go through this . you love your kitty and you have been a wonderful kitty parent. Because you love your kitty, you know in your heart that you need to do what is best for her .. and it will be hard.

Prayers and purrs for you .. that you will allow yourself to grieve while remembering all the wonderful, furry, purry times that you had with your special friend. Your kitty has left pawprints on your heart, and little fuzzy cat hairs on your soul.

To be loved by a kitty is a gift from God . your kitty's passing will never change that love.

((( hug )))

All the best .. thinking and praying for you. Feel free to email me if I can help in any way, ok?
You need to do what's best for HER. You know it and that's part of what's hurting you. I had to let go of my cat, my baby, and have him put to sleep a couple years ago and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life. I cried and cried.but I did it because it wasn't fair to him to let exist in the condition he was in. Yes, I mourned him and yes, I miss him terribly still. But I know I did what was right. Make peace with her and say your goodbyes, but dont make her suffer anymore. You have my sympathies.I am very sorry for your loss. It's never easy to let go.
I think al though you love the cat you have to put her down it will be sad at first be at least she isn't in pain and you will feel better about it later it will be worse waking up one day finding her past away at your door
2 weeks ago we had to put our cat to sleep due to kidney failure.
She was diagnosed just a few weeks back after losing weight and eating less. She seemed to be in no pain and seemed happy, but we made the decision of putting her to sleep BEFORE she got really sick and lost more weight. You have to do this for your cat, anything else would be cruel, in my opinion. This is not the time for you to be selfish and keep the cat because you would be sad och feel sorry when she's gone. Think of this as the last favour you're able to do you cat. Wouldn't you rather remember her as the sweet and cuddly cat she was instead of remembering how sick she was at the end. If you let the cat live on with this condition she will only get worse and worse - and that's not fair on your pet.
I know it's really hard - I've been there and have put pets to sleep. It hurts, but please - do this for your cat!
Kitty was a totally black cat, who lived til hewas 24 human yrs. old. I can't put into words what he meant to me. He got urinary disease and I had to put a sort of diaper on him an change it like you do with a baby. I had to hold up his rear when he ate. Went through this for about amonth. Finally I had to make the decision. I held him inmy arms when he was uthinated. When I handed him to the vet, I nearly collapsed. It wasn't fair of me to let him go on living in that condition only because I didn't want to let him go. I have him on video and a framed photo of me holding him. I now have a female who is 21 yrs old, and she is still doing good, but I know the time is near. Let her go, but hold her when she is put down. Don't let her suffer to die at home, if you really love her. You are being cruel if you let her suffer because you can't let go. You will never get over her, but you the pain will ease knowing you did the right thing FOR HER> EMAIL me if you need support.
the loss of your best friend is the hardest ever. I can't tell you what to decide. it kills you to see them hurting, but realize that if she is hurting she isn't her self anymore .. what kind of friend would you be to make her endure for your own purposes? (forgive me if that's harsh- I have had to make this choice too, and it kills me to think about it, because in my greed I didn't want to let my dearest friend go either, but now I realize two things he was there when I needed him most, and still lives in my memories, and second nothing no matter how wonderful and perfect it may seem can ever last forever --excluding friendship and memories, death can not end either one.) I do hope I have not offended.and I truly feel for you and your loss..may you find peace of heart again.
hiya, i know how you feel, i had to put me 16 year old to sleep a week before christmas last year, it broke my heart but i came to the conclusion that she was in pain with the same thing. she would not eat at the end and she lost so much weight that i thought it was best. i would rather think of her running around as a young kitten again than her being in pain. your little girl probably does not want to upset you so does not make a fuss, however you do have to go with what the vet says. if you leave her to it at home, she will be in pain. at least this way you know you will be with her to tell her you love her at the end.
I am very sorry, but she is dying! When the Kidneys go, that is it! My cat had the same problem and went away to die, so I took him to the Vet and he was put down! It is heart-breaking to watch a loved friend go through this and the kindest thing is to put her down! It is devastating, but you get over it in time,and you will always have the memories of your beloved companion.I have another cat now who is coming up to 10 and in good health and I think I love her more than I loved the cat who died from the Kidney problems! I will always remember the other cat,but I have my girl now and she is my best friend! So, don`t let your cat suffer,and one day when you are ready, you may find another furry friend and love it as much,or more than your poor friend now.Do the right thing and put her out of her misery!It is heart-breaking,but you will recover! I promise! All the very best and I am sorry for your pain,truly! I understand where you are at completely, and I sympathise! God Bless.
Well I really think you should give her piece and let her go because if you don't then she will be in pain until she dies.And believe me I know how you feel because I had to do the same for my cat ace when he was dieing.

Because he had a real bad cut on his ear and he wouldn't eat or drink any thing ether when he was getting weak from all the blood that he had lost and I tried every thing with him but it just wasn't enough.

So the vet told me to give him up for dead and when he told me that I cried for week's after I did but now he is in a better place and isn't in any pain anymore and there is just no easy way to deal with a lost of an love one.

So you are going to have to deal with it in your own way like I had to but just think of the good thing's you guy's did and tell your self that she is in a better place and just keep telling your self that until you believe that she is in a better place.

That is pretty much how I had to do to cope with it and you should just think about it because if you really do care about her you'll do the same and get to keep her out of pain misery and sorrow ok and may god bless the both of you'se =(
I'm so very sorry. I know exactly what your feeling. I went through it last year, with Pepper. He was my best friend and went every where with me since he fit in my sweat shirt pocket. It's so hard to loss them and even harder to watch them die slowly. I knew in my heart a vet couldn't fix what was wrong and after taking him to many vets who, hurt him, by taking blood and putting him through that. He never liked vets. Then not one of them could tell me exactly what was wrong A couple wanted to do exploatory surgery, but he was to weak. They wanted to do more invasivive proccedures all the time he was getting weaker and hating me for putting him through this. I stopped I brought him home, I carried him to his kitty pan every few hours for over 3 months, feeding him anything he had ever liked to eat purred by a spoon, forced water down him, gave him subq fluids a few times, kept him warm and on pillows as he was getting thinner by the day. I slept with him in my lap or next to me for a few hours at a time. Only to wake, to make sure he was as comfortable as I could make him and still breathing. I talked to him constantly and petted his head.

It was the hardest thing I've ever done. I had taken seriouly injured animals to vets to be put down, but I knew they were in terrible pain and that was the last and kindest thing I could do for them, to stop their pain a ease their surffering.

So it's a question only you can answer. Look into your cat eyes and you'll know what the right thing is. If you see pain, you can't let that continue. You can make dam sure the vet will allow you to hold her, that he gives her a sedative first or a little gas, so the procedure doesn't cause her any more pain or distress. That's how you say good bye.

Afterwards, the pain in your heart, is because they take a tiny piece of your heart with them whe they go to the Rainbow bridge and there they are happy, healthy and cared for until it's your turn. I have to believe that they are there waitng for you and you'll be together again someday.

The only thing that eases the pain is time. And in time, the pain will become love again and you'll remember the happiness you shared. It will always hurt, but it will get easier in time.

My heart goes out to you.. I have some resources for you I'll add that, will make you cry. but they'll help too. I strongly recommend that you check out the support/pet loss chats held at the Cathobbyist.com. It is comforting to be able to talk to others who really understand . I have a much longer list of source for grief and support. If you need them. I also am a chat host at cathobbyist.com. Just ask anyone for PHStray and they'll tell you how to get hold of me if you need to talk.
If your cat is not experiencing pain why not keep her close to you while you can. She knows and feels the love for you and knows that you are caring for her. She is sleeping more and one day she will fall asleep and not wake up. Knowing that she is in her own home will help her to be calm. I don't think she want to leave you anymore than you want to lose her. You have been very blessed by this cat and it will be hard when she is gone. You will be sad for a long time but then it gets better a little bit at a time. Remember its ok to be sad because this little friend was a big part of your life. God bless you and your cat.

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